DAY 4 - COULD HAVE DONE BETTER.

Went OVER my calories today.  Did fine until we went out to eat for supper.  I have no idea how many calories were in what I ate so I had to guesstimate.  I ate a salad, GRILLED chicken with angel hair pasta and had cheese cake for dessert. BUT -  I only ate 1 2 bites of the cheese cake and gave the rest to Major.

I had already decided I was not going to eat but a few bites of it and I stuck to my guns!!

I feel so stuffed right now.  But considering how I usually eat when I eat out, I think I did pretty good.  I suppose I am getting used to eating a smaller amount.  That is a good thing.

I should have stuck with the salad I usually get, but Major wanted to get the 5:00 special which was a salad, your meal and then dessert.  I wanted to split a meal but he wouldn't go for that.  And the main course was smaller than what most places serve.  I even left some on my plate.  So, all is not lost.

It is so hard with a husband who needs to eat better but doesn't care to.  I probably should not have gone.  Maybe next time I will tell him no.  He will just have to get mad or find someone else to go with him!!

I won't dwell on it.  And I won't beat myself up about it.  I did better than I usually do.

Tomorrow is another day to start fresh!

MOTIVATIONAL THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts.

Eleanor Roosevelt

It's time for a change....

MAKE it a great day,

Betty 

DAY 3 - A PRETTY GOOD ONE!

7:00 a.m.

Breakfast -
1 - Peanut butter and jam sandwich
1 - String cheese
8 - Wheat thin crackers

As we had no electricity this morning I could not cook, (which I don't normally do anyway, hehe..) so a P&J sandwich it was!!

9:05 a.m. - I ate a nice breakfast at 7:00 a.m. Why am I so damn hungry????  Snack time is at 10 a.m.  I will hold out till then because I can't really be THAT hungry now can I????  But my stomach is growling.  I guess it is used to more food that it has been getting lately and it is revolting!

10:00 a.m. Ate snack of 1 string cheese and 8 nut-thins pecan crackers which are yummy by the way!!!!

11:30 - Did 20+ flights of stairs at work. My legs were shaking from weakness! 

12:15 p.m. Ate lunch  Amy's Black Bean and Cheese Enchilada with rice.

1:49 p.m.  - I AM STARVING....No, not really but my stomach is growling.  Snack time is now at 3:00 p.m. WILL NOT EAT TILL THEN!!! And then I am planning on having Light and Fit peach yogurt for 80 calories. 

I have had 835 calories so far.   My calorie allotment is 1300.  That is not much, IMHO!!!  Not sure what I'm having for supper yet......

We got off early because of the weather and I was hungry so I decided to eat supper early (4 p.m.) and go to bed early (yeah right)...ha ha.   I have lots of typing to do so I will keep busy with typing and will have my evening snack and go to bed.  I am committed to doing that.

So, lets wind up this day, shall we -

CALORIES 
Breakfast - 450 calories
10 am snack - 125 calories
Lunch - 240 calories
3 pm snack - 110
Supper - 273 calories
Evening snack - 110 calories

TOTAL 1,308 calories for the day.  Yea!!

EXERCISE
We have a huge staircase and I climbed it up AND down 20+ times at lunch today. I lost count. Weather was bad so I could not go outside to walk.  And no workout today with trainer.

If I could burn calories typing, I would be the size of a toothpick!!!!

So today was pretty good.  It is now 6:30 and I since I have committed to YOU, the people, my accountability partners, what I have eaten or will eat, I WILL do as I have said.  

Thank you for your continued support and encouragement!  I really need it!  And I hope you have had a great healthy and active day as well.

RANDOM MOTIVATIONAL QUOTE FOR THE DAY

Lee Iacocca: You've got to say, I think that if I keep working at this and want it badly enough, I can have it. It's called perseverance.

It's time for a change......

MAKE it a great day, 

Betty 

DAY 2, MYFITNESSPAL.COM AND FITBIT

This is going to be short and sweet because I just got home from the gym after my grueling workout and I am sore.  It is 8:57 and I still have lots of typing to get done. :)

I did well today on my food.  Around 10 am I walk into the kitchen at work for my snack and this is what I saw: 

But I DID NOT EAT ANY!  I really did not even want them.  I told myself I did not want them, I got what I came to the kitchen for and I did not linger.  And not but  1 time did I even think about them.  Usually that is ALL I THINK ABOUT if I know they are in the kitchen.  Ya for me!!

Calories today 1,225.  

Exercise 

• 1.5 mile walk at lunch. 

At the gym: 

• 1 slow lap around the gym.
• 2 fast laps around the gym.
• Lots of floor exercises, jumping jacks, lungs etc.  
• Biceps curl machine - 3 sets of 12 @ 30 pounds.  
• Chest press machine - 3 sets of 12 # 15 pounds.
• Ab machine - 77 reps in 2 minutes.  
• Exercise with a 10 pound ball.
• Arm exercises with free weights.  

I can't name all of the things we did.  We spent 1 hour and 15 minutes in the gym and my body is feeling it!!!!

I took some Advil because I know I might be a little sore in the morning. This is our last "official" workout with trainer this week.  

I might be going to visit my grandson and I must remember to eat well and exercise while there.  I tend to "let go" when I am at their house but I will make an effect to eat right this time.   

I feel well and confident that I can do this thing - this time!!  

I did get extremely hungry at work but I decided to forego my snack and wait till supper.  I am counting calories and did not want to go over.  

Another little tool I am using is  this website for calorie counting .  They also have an app that I use. I love it because I can just scan the bar code for all of my food and it is entered in.  It is so easy to use and not time consuming like some of the other I have used.  

I am also using the Fitbit.  I love this little tool.  It is like a pedometer but a whole lot more.  It counts may steps, my calories burned, any flights of stair I might climb.  It is a really cool little tool.  It  is small and clips onto my pants at the waist or I can even just carry it in  my pocket. I LOVE IT.   It is so bad that I almost have to come back home if I forget it when I leave for work!  Here is a pic.  

So here are my stats for my Fitbit today:

10,906 steps

4.57 total miles traveled 

2,245 calories burned

I don't rely too heavily on the calories burned on this but that does include my TOTAL calories for the WHOLE DAY and not just when I was exercising.  Believe it or not, we burn calories just by breathing but not too many.  :)

So there you have it.  All in all, today was a good day.  I am sure not all days will be this good but I will enjoy them while I can.  

Maybe this wasn't so short after all.  At any rate, I must get back to work.  Please continue to pray for me and if you stop by and read my blog please leave me some love (encouragement).  I need all the help I can get.  

Today's quote is from Jillian Michaels:

Why are you choosing failure when success is still an option?  

It's time for a change.....

Betty 

DAY 1

I have been keeping up with my weight loss (or gain or stay the same) since 2006. In 2006 I weighed 238 - my highest ever!!  I proceeded to lose 70 pounds with the help of diet pills.  But I knew I could not keep taking them forever so I stopped them and my appetite returned like a vengeance!!  I gained back about 30 pounds so I am currently at a 41 pound weight loss.  I started running in 2009 thinking that would help me lose weight but at no time did I change my eating habits - at least not for very long.  So - to make a long story short - I am been staying the same, give or take 10 pounds, for about 3 years.  And I am sick of it.

I have run numerous 5Ks, 10Ks, and 4 half marathons and I am not fast but I do finish them.  I have been killing myself trying to run faster and I have improved a little bit.  On most days I am happy just to be out there and able to move.  But I want MORE!  I want to be faster, finish quicker, make new PRs and I know I can't do that without weight loss. So that is where I stand today. I have the exercise and running down pat.  I can do that - no problem.  It's the food I struggle with but I am about to change that.  Don't get me wrong - I am sure it will still be a struggle but I feel I am worth it and I want it really bad.  I am tired of being the "fat" woman.  I am tired of my back hurting, although not too bad, but mainly I just want to be

 I want to live a long time for my grandchildren. I am only 55.  Some days that feels old and other days it feels young.

So - my long story is turning out long instead of short.  Sorry, I will finish it up. So TODAY  is day 1 of my healthy lifestyle.  I am going to lose around 50 pounds.  And I need YOUR HELP.  Please read my blog and if you feel lead to, please comment and encourage me. If you have any pointers you could give me that would be nice.  After years of being in recovery one thing I do know - conquering any addiction or problem is a lot easier with others along side me!  So I plan to post my weigh-ins each week, maybe some of what I am eating, and of course my exercise.  So here goes -

Weight today - 197.3
Weight goal - 140
Pounds lost - 0

Today and yesterday I worked with my trainer Curtis and my friend Almedia  in the park. It was a hard workout.  He is helping me to run faster. And we are going to begin weight lifting tomorrow. I am super excited about that.  I have always wanted to try weight lifting.

So, if you will notice my weight tracker above, I have started over. I am not counting the 41 pounds I have already lost. I am starting at 0 lost and will work from there.  It's really humbling to do that.  I want everyone to see that I have lost 41 pounds!! But as long as it says that, I get comfortable and prideful and don't do very well at weight loss. Yes, I have lost some weight and I am pound of that but I still have 50 pounds to go.  So I am not the finished product yet.

I am sure I will have good days and bad days but please bear with me. I am not perfect and I am looking for progress not perfection.

It's time for a change...

Betty

Make a choice and stick to it - no matter what!

Today I have decided I am going to throw in the towel. Give up you say?? No – not give up. I am going to decide TODAY (one more time) to do this thing. I have been going up and down on a weight loss roller coaster ride for the past few years. I am going to throw in the towel on negativism, on using food for comfort, etc. etc. you get the jest of it.


I think the hardest part for me is knowing I have to do this for the rest of my life. Why can’t I just be skinny. Why wasn’t I born skinny? I don’t know the answer to that. I do know that I will have to struggle with this weight issue forever and I don’t like that thought. But, I can take comfort in what I learned in treatment when I was trying to quit drinking – ONE DAY AT A TIME. Why do I find that so hard to do? I should be able to do anything for just ONE DAY. Including listening to my stomach growl, thinking I am going to die if I don’t have that {fill in the blank} food I am craving, wanting that fried or sweet thing so bad that I could cry but not wanting to give in.

I started this blog a while back hoping to give encouragement to others in their weight loss journey and also to get some encouragement. But unfortunately I don’t feel I have been much encouragement. I have not done the things I started out to do. I have “slipped” back and forth between weight loss and weight gain therefore not really making any progress other than staying relatively close to the same weight for a few years.

I am working out like a demon on most days so the only thing I can up with is I must be eating a tremendous amount of calories to not be losing weight. And there is no guessing to that. I KNOW I am doing that. Just one meal at a fast food joint can wipe out my calorie allotment for the day. I know this but I do it anyway. I am sabotaging myself. Why? Why do I do this? And I know that the first bite will lead to another one, and another one, and another one. That first bite is what does me in. It’s like drinking – if I don’t have the first drink I will never have the whole fifth or the whole bottle. Simple, but oh so hard to do sometimes.

When I quit drinking some 20+ years ago I had resolve to never drink again no matter what. And I made it! When I quit smoking some 18+ years ago I had the same resolve – to not pick up that FIRST cigarette – no matter what! Why oh why is food so much harder? I guess because I have to eat. I don’t have to smoke or drink but I have to eat to survive. There is no way around it!

I read a great blog the other day and she talked about retraining the brain. You can read her blog  here. I think that is what I need to do. I have lived with overeating and the “diet” mentality for so long it is second nature for me. I live to eat when I need to eat to live.

I meant to weigh today when I got up but I did not. So I will weigh in the morning and that will be my starting (again) weight. And I will post it here. No, I don’t want to. But I feel it will help me be accountable. I NEED and WANT accountability. That is the only way this thing will work.

And I want anyone who reads this to feel free to post comments and encouragement and anything you think will help me. I will work up my stats tonight (hopefully) and post them on tomorrow.

Right now I am starving!!!!! No, not really, but my mind tells me I am and I am going to stop listening to my mind lie to me. Because I know it will. It did for years when I was drinking and drugging. I don’t have to listen to that today. I don’t!! In reality I know that if I don’t eat that donut or pizza or whatever that I absolutely WILL NOT DIE. Even if my mind tells me I going to.

So tomorrow will be day 1 and I will post my weight and maybe what I am eating and the exercise I am doing. And I will certainly include my races that I compete it. I love running but I hate that I am so overweight that I am not a little faster. I competed in a 5K yesterday and I finished last. Don’t get me wrong – I have finished last before and it’s no big deal. At least I am out there doing something and not sitting on the couch. But I am tired of just getting by. I want to do better. I want to improve – not just get by. I don’t necessarily want to win, I just want to improve. After all, I am 55 years old and I had never exercised in my life until a few years ago. So I have improved since I first started this journey but I want to continue to improve. Not die a fat old lady in terrible health but I want quality of life for the few years I have left here on this earth. That’s not too much to ask is it? But – it’s all up to me. I am the captain of my ship. I am in control of my destiny. I can do this thing or I can continue to whine about why it’s not working.

It is about quality of life for me. Do I want to just merely survive or do I want to live life to the fullest?

It’s my choice.

Make a choice Betty and this time STICK TO IT!!!!!!!

I SLIPPED OR WAS IT BECAUSE I WANTED TO??

I love food. It’s plain and simple. I LOVE FOOD. I guess I love food more than being healthy, more than losing weight, more than running faster, almost more than life itself. Because if I keep eating like this I will die. I am going to die anyway but I could die sooner if I continue my unhealthy way of life.


I am sure many of you have heard this before…I do good for a while and then slip back into my old ways. Wait a minute - - - slip??? Is that a good word? Do I really slip or do I just do what I WANT TO DO, like I was sharing with someone earlier, while I was eating the biggest piece of white chocolate bread pudding I have ever seen!! The thought did cross my mind that “I certainly don’t need this” and I even stated that fact OUT LOUD to my friend sitting across the table from me, who by the way did NOT get dessert. And even that did not stop me. Simply put – I did what I WANTED TO DO.

That is it in a nutshell. Left to my own devices I will ALWAYS do what I want. Not what you want or he wants or anyone else wants – only what I want!!

And I guess here lately I have wanted to eat LOTS of things that are not good for me. I am a fast food junkie and once I start that cycle, it is hard to quit. But I will quit. And you know when?

WHEN I WANT TO and not a minute before. I have just got to find a reason to want to!!!!!!!!


Pray for me people.

Summer Workout

This is a fun video my friend Almedia made.  It shows us working out in the gym.  It was all in fun and we had a great time doing it!

Summer Workout