Wednesday, December 14, 2016
A read a friends post and it reminded me that I used to blog but haven't in a long time. I mostly blogged about my running and the weight I still have not lost. (Sigh). But I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and osteoarthritis and am now unable to run. I also had to quit my job. I just couldn't do it any more. The stress was too much! I can hardly do much in the way of housework and such. I do good to take care of my two sweet fur babies, Lillie and Minnie.
My husband is a doll. He doesn't exactly understand my illnesses but he does the best he can, I guess. It's sometimes hard to understand something that you haven't experienced yourself. Along with the two illnesses mentioned above I also struggle with anxiety and depression, back pain, IBS, esophageal strictures and had to have my throat stretched twice because of scar tissue built up in my esophagus from the Gastroesophageal reflux(GERD). I also have Pernicious Anemia and take monthly B12 shots. But I think the worse of it all is the fatigue. It renders me useless on most days.
It is hard to believe that only a few years ago I was running half marathons. I think the fibromyalgia came after my mom died. I will never get over that. I still cry at times-especially Christmas time. She died unexpectedly on December 18, 2010 from a heart attack. Just the way she had said she wanted to go. No suffering. Here one minute and gone the next. But it sure was a shock for the ones left behind. I have tried to be ok with it but some days are harder than others.
At this moment I am at my son's house visiting grand babies. That always helps with the depression. Some days are better than others but I still am so blessed. My life could be so different. Compared to what it could have been, I'm doing ok. I can walk, I can function normally on most days (except for the fatigue) and the pain is mostly bearable. The chronic fatigue and pain is what gets me most of the time. I also struggled with neuropathy of my feet. My last half marathon was awful. The bottom of my feet were burning so bad I had to walk most of it and did not think I would finish. I have never hurt so bad!!! That is when I realized that my running career might be at an end.
So to bring everything up to date-I have been trying to do some walking with a friend. We walk in the mall and the most I can do is 2 miles and that is with a break in between each lap. But that is ok. At least I'm moving. And I'm going to try to keep moving.
I don't know that weight loss will be in my future with the meds I have to take but I will try my best. I know that weight loss would really help my overall health. So I guess I will keep trying.
Peace and love friends!