Sunday, March 31, 2013
I REFUSE TO GIVE UP ON MYSELF
I am having a hard time. My eating is badly out of control and I feel helpless to stop it. But I know that is not true. I see people who are being successful at weight loss and I feel sorry for myself. But.....it's no one's fault but my own. They can't lose it for me. Only I can do it. That much I do know.
But I refuse to give up. Simply put - when I give up, I gain weight. And I have given up. Since Christmas I have been eating anything I wanted with only a few days of healthy eating. I have gained 20 pounds. And I have a half marathon THIS SATURDAY.
IT IS NOT GOING TO BE PRETTY!
But I will finish and and I will do something about this uncontrolled eating. Starting tomorrow. I have done everything I know to do in the past:
1. Gotten accountability.
2. Rid my house of junk food.
3. Got rid of all "big" clothes.
4. Weigh every day or don't weigh every day.
5. Eat no sugar, eat some sugar etc...
6. Eat more protein.
7. Eat less protein...
Well, you get the idea. Here I am whining again about how I can't lose weight. Poor pitiful me. And that attitude has gotten me NO WHERE!!! EXCEPT FATTER!!!!!
So, once again I plan to start over. But I am tried of starting over. Maybe this will be my last time to start over. I can't keep using my compulsive overeating husband as an excuse for my weight gain. I should be setting a better example for him and maybe he will join me. I have 1,000 excuses why I'm not losing weight but the real reason is - I eat too much. There!!! I said it - I EAT TOO MUCH!!!!!
I am going to PRAY for better control this week, LOG my food, go to my OA MEETING. Yes, it's a pain
sometimes most of the time to do what I know I need to do.
So, I can either stay miserable or work hard to be fit and healthy. The choice is mine but I must be willing to live with the choice I make.