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Thursday, November 29, 2012

Still here! St. Jude Half this Saturday

I am still here.  Just not happy with myself right now.  I have gained some weight and am finding it hard to lose.   I have been focusing on my running and maybe I need to focus on the weight loss.  The running is a lot harder when I gain weight of course.

I have my fourth St. Jude Half Marathon this Saturday and I hope it won't be too hard since I am a little heavier than before.  You would think with three HMs coming up I would be more health conscious but that is not what is happening I am afraid.  This compulsive overeating is about to get the best of me.  And it doesn't help that I live with a compulsive over eater  that is in severe denial as well!  But I can't blame him.  I make my own choices and I can chose to do right even when he doesn't.  So far that is NOT what I have done!!!

I can't seem to find any consistency with my healthy eating and my weight loss.  I do okay for a while then revert back to my unhealthy habits.  I don't know what I need to do.

  • Get real?  
  • Get serious?
  • Get drunk???? (just kidding - not gonna throw away 21 years of sobriety over this food issue)
Sometimes life stinks and sometimes it is great!  I can't always have it perfect.  

  • I have not been running much. 
  • I have not been eating healthy.
  • I have not been going to my OA meetings.
  • I have not been going to my AA meetings.  
I have only been working, working, working.  And my job is sometimes very stressful!  Well, enough of the excuses.  I won't do anything about anything until I get sick and tired of being sick and tired.  That much I  know!!!

But I am EXCITED about my half marathon this Saturday.  My time will probably suck but I WILL FINISH. 

All I want to do is cross that finish line -  
  1. Standing up
  2. With a smile on my face
  3. And wanting to do it all again!!!  
Until next time friends! 
Have a wonderful night!

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