Back in the saddle again...uh treadmill, I mean.

I have done well today my friends!  I have stayed under my calorie goal and I want to the gym and ran 1.91 miles and walked another mile.  Felt great as always.  My time is slower because I am not in as good of shape as I used to be.  I am not logging near as many miles but I intend to step it up some.  My second job at night when I get home from my "real" job is keeping me so busy  that it is  hard to find the time to run but we are trying to get our bills paid off and hopefully one day I can stay at home and play with all these grand kids we are having.  That's my idea of fun!!  Plus a few races here and there too, of course!!

It has been unbelievably hot here and when I do get the change to run I am been doing it on the treadmill and we all know that is not the same as running outside but it sure beats sitting on the couch.  I know if I would go to bed earlier, I could get up earlier and exercise in the morning time.  That is my plan tonight.  I am going to go to bed in a few minutes, around 8 pm hopefully,  and try my best to get up at 5 am and exercise on my treadmill here at the house.  I have said this a thousand times and have only done it a few times.  But it is hard to get up early when I don't get in the bed before 11 or 12 at night.  My schedule is kind of hectic.  But tonight is a free night and on top of that, we got off work an hour early and I had only  a few x-rays to type when I got home instead of the usual 30-40.  So I am going to take advantage of this night.  And I have my treadmill set up and ready to go.   So we'll see.

Say a prayer for me and I hope you all have a great evening.

Here's some motivation for you....

Made To Crave Book and ramblings.

I have found that blogging helps to keep me on track so I will try to do it daily (once again).

Today was great!  I have not eaten compulsively.  The thought did cross my mind but I did not give in.  I had my breakfast, my 10 am snack, lunch, 3 pm snack, dinner, and am about to have a pm snack after I finish here.  My calorie goal for today was 1360 and I have eaten 1240 so that is pretty good. And I don't feel hungry either.   There was no food brought to the office today, thank goodness!

OA meeting was good too.  We have been listening to an OA Big Book Study. We are starting to talk about step 4.  I always feel better after a meeting!  I feel more confident and I really believe I can do do this thing.

I read a book a while back called Made to Crave:  Satisfying Your Deepest Desire with God, Not Food by Lysa Terkeurst.



It was a very good book but I read it and laid it aside without much thought. I believe I need to read it again and really put my mind to studying it this time.  There are some profound statements in there such as:

"We have to see the purpose of our struggle with food as something more than getting to wear smaller sizes and receiving compliments.  SHALLOW DESIRES PRODUCE SHALLOW EFFORTS.  These good things are nice, but not as appealing in the moment as a cinnamon roll, or those chips, or that brownie.  The process of getting healthy has to be about more than just losing weight and focusing on ourselves.  It's not about adjusting our diets and hoping for good physical results.  It's about re-calibrating our souls so that we want to change for the right reasons."

Wow!! That says a lot people!  I really get that "shallow desires produce shallow efforts" and my efforts have been pretty shallow here lately.  That is something I am going to ponder on.  I believe I shall read this book again and I mean really read it this time!

Have a great night my friends!
Betty

Contemplating

I am sitting here contemplating my state of affairs. Wanting to lose weight but not willing to do what it takes. wanting all this fat to just melt off me. ~sigh~

Every time I run a race I realize how bad I need to lose weight! I could be faster, I would feel better, there are so many positives to losing this weight!

I remember my bottom from my drug use. What is it going to take to hit bottom with my eating behavior? I got sober almost 20 years ago and stayed sober! No back and forth, up and down, in and out of AA. Just quit drinking and drugging and that was it! but this food thing seems to be a whole different animal for me! I can't get it or won't get it.

I try to say it's because there are not enough OA meetings, blah,blah,any excuse will do I suppose.

Wonder what it will take to get and maintain abstinence? I know the answer but am I willing to do what it takes? I guess I'm not-at least not now.

Thanks for listening.

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Delta Sole 5K 2011

Since it is late and I am tired, I will let the pics tell the story.  

Garmin said: 

Miles 3:14

Mile 1 - 13:11

Mile 2 - 13:55

Mile 3 - 14:00 

Average pace - 13:36

Time:  42:42

Still starting out too fast.  Will have to work on that!  

Mommy, can I have a do-over?

I haven't posted in a while and I won't come up with excuses.  Just suffice to say that I haven't been in the best of moods.

It's the same ole, same ole anyway.....

I am up early this morning for a 5K.  I have not run once this week so I should be fresh (or not prepared, whichever way you want to look at it) for this race!  But I know I will have a fun time and I will cross that finish line.  My time on this race last year was 41:23.  Don't know that I can beat that time since I have not been training like I should.  But just being out there is cool!!  Race day weather so far is Temp:  66 at 6:25 am and Humidity 94% (not good).  But at least it won't be too hot!

I can't seem to find the same enthusiasm I had for all this running stuff when I first started.  I originally started running to lose weight and that did not happen.  I guess I though that the pounds would magically melt off of me just because I got up off the couch.  But I can't seem to control the hand-to-mouth thing.   But I will continue to work on it - one day at a time.  I haven't gained.  I just seem to be at a stand still.

One of these days I am going to love myself enough to really want this thing.  Until then - I'll just keep trying.

Now, for my last cup of coffee before this 5K.  I'm excited.  The race day is always fun. It's the training that sucks.  lol

I did sign up for St. Jude again but I signed up as HERO so I am raising $500.00 for the kids of St. Jude. Please pray and if you feel lead, I would love for you to join me in helping them with a monetary donation. My page is below if you would like to help  

www.mystjudeheroes.org/bettyhogue

  

It was a hard decision because for the first time my mom will not be there with me. She was my best cheerleader.   But I know she would want me to do it again.

Have a great weekend my friends.