Back on Track Again (December 11, 2008)

i must admit .... I did what I said I would not do. I gained it back!!! But not all of it thank the Lord. I lost 58 pounds. I felt great. Everybody was commenting on how good I looked. My weight was 179. I guess I got proud and I strutted around for a while but now I have come back to land on thorny ground. My weight is now 207! What went wrong? I STOPPED doing what I know was working. In recovery when someone relapses they will eventually look back and see where they went wrong. Nine times out of ten they have quit coming to meetings, quit talking with their sponsors and accountability partners, quit sharing with others who have the same struggles, start hanging out with old friends... and on and on and on. I can relate!! In my struggle with weight loss, I stopped doing the things that were working for me. I stopped coming to Spark People, stop blogging, stop exercising, and started eating anything I wanted. How quickly the pounds pile back on. I put on a pair of jeans that a few weeks ago were loose and could hardly zip them up. That was an eye opener for me. Why weren't my eyes opened a few pounds earlier!!! But a fact is a fact and the truth hurts. I went back to my old behaviors and look what it got me! It got me 20 pounds. I was even watching Biggest Loser and getting motivated but the motivation wore off after only a few days. Then my husband, whom I have complained about for years because he is almost 400 pounds and getting bigger decided to join the Y. He has been exercising faithfully and watching what he eats. He has lost 20 pounds! I am so proud of him! For a long time now I wanted him to do this with me. Well, now he is and I really pumped. I am excited because I feel like I can do better now that he is doing it also. He success is a motivating factor for me. Watching him and knowing how much he has to lose makes me proud of him but it also helps me. To know that he can do it makes me want to do it. I know I can't let that be the only reason that I think I can lose this weight. What I trying to say is that I think it will be easier since he is trying to live healthier too. There are just the two of us here at home so I won't have to buy those tempting treats that he loves and I could not seem to stay out of. Long story short, I am so glad he has decided to do this and I will support him all the way as he supports me. I think we make a great team. I had also gotten him to watch Biggest Loser (by accident) and I think that may have motivated him some by seeing the men on there. I could not get him to watch it but when he heard me in the other room shouting and jumping up and down about the before and after pictures, he would turn the channel to watch it Now he watches it all the time. I know that I must do this for ME regardless of what he does but it makes it easier for me when he encourages me and he does that without even knowing, by losing weight himself! I have started cutting out the fast food and diet cokes again. I have been to the Y twice this week and I have been back on here doing what I need to do. Next week my blog might say, oops.....I screwed up. But hey, they say it is not failure if you get back up and I have gotten back up lots and lots of times and will continue to do so. I will never give up on this weight loss journey. I may lose and gain a few but I will never give up. I want to see that "I lost 100 pounds" mark. And I am not starting after the first of the year. I am starting NOW! God!! I feel so good when I exercise and eat right. Why in the world do I stop doing what makes me feel good?? It's a mystery to me. All in all, life is good and I am proud of myself for continuing to trudge along this road of destiny. And I am glad my fellow sparkers are all in this with me as well. MAKE it a healthy day!