Unable to complete long run. (November 9, 2009)

Monday, November 09, 2009 I was unable to complete my 12.5 miles this past Sat. No, it was not my pulled calf muscle but my right foot! It started hurting at mile 3 and I though..uh oh..this is not good! It was on the bottom and would go up through my ankle. I have had it before but not very much. It was not unbearable but by mile 5 I decided I would go home. Better to pull out on the training run than the actual race itself. I keep telling myself not to feel bad about it. I am so compulsive with things. But I did get up this am and go to Y and do 48 minutes on elliptical. I don't believe I burn the calories that Sparkpeople says I do but that's ok. But I was moving anyway! More than I have been lately. My husband went so I was motivated to go too. I told him to wake me up but he didn't believe I would go and I almost talked myself out of it when he did wake me up. (God! I wish I could break that habit!!!!) But all in all, I am not going to let Saturday get me down. I am going to look at the positive...after all, I did do 5 miles! It wasn't like I didn't do anything. I remember when 5 miles sounded like it was around the world and back! My how things change. MAKE it a great day everyone!

This and that

Today I ran three miles at the park with a friend. Was disappointed once again because my GPS app on my BB would not work right. It only recorded about 15 minutes of running. I don't know if the trees interferred with it or what! But some days it works fine and other days it doesn't. I hate having an incorrect reading when it uploads to the website. But at least I have a record of it at Sparkpeople.

I over ate yesterday at lunch. :( We had a rep come in and they provided cajun food! I did good on the actual food but blew it big time on the dessert - bread pudding with white chocolate sauce. And I went back for more dessert at 3 pm instead of eating what I brought with me for a snack. Why do I do that? I have got to get a grip on this. I am so tired of yo-yoing back and forth. So my run this morning was yucky at first. I felt bloated and heavy and found it hard to run. But I persisted. I felt better by the end of the run. I did 1:1 for the first two miles and did 2:1 the last mile. I know that my weight is holding me back from doing better. I could run faster if I was lighter. duh! But me and only me can do anything about that.

I have started a bible study online at www.settingcaptivesfree.com for overeating. I have done one of their studies before and loved it. It should help me to learn to fill up on God's word and not on food. I know that food has been a comfort to me in times of trial and I don't want to continue to let it be my crutch for life. I need to fill up on Christ. I know I can do this. I have conquered drugs, alcohol and cigaretts so I know I will conquer this - in due time. At least knowing I have a half marathon to run in December is giving me some incentive to do better with my eating behavior.

Right now my stomach is growling terribly and I refuse to listen to it. I will NOT go over my calories today - I WILL NOT!

Thank goodness for SparkPeople. I could not have come this far without this site I don't believe. I was so surpised when I realized how many calories I was REALLY eating! Wow! What an eye opener! But I find myself cheating at least once a week and it continues to catch up with me. I lie to myself and say that this ONE TIME won't hurt and I will start over tomorrow - therefore the yo-yoing back and forth! But I am so grateful that I can identify my problem - I just need to come to grips with it and do what I know to do. It is not like I am in denial. I know and will admit what my problem is - I am just choosing to not do anything about it. But that stops today! (how many times have I said that!) But at any rate, like I told someone else today - don't give up. And I will take my own advice and I won't give up - I will continue on to the bitter end.

7 pounds in two days???!!!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

How in the world can one gain 7 pounds in two days? When it comes to gaining weight, anything is possible for me. Why can't it come off that fast ???

I went to a birthday party for a friend and I went hungry and I lost all control while I was there. While I was eating I was telling myself this is not good, this is too much, no - not seconds but did I listen .........NO! So I deserve what I got. But I am not too stressed about it. Since I started running I have been able to see changes without thinking about the number on the scale. My clothes are still getting too big and I believe I am loosing inches, at least in my legs for sure. Like I told a friend, I will just pick up my bootstraps and get back on track, which I have done this week.

I have come to realize that this is a lifelong committment and the scales will not always be to my liking but I can always start over the next day. I will not continue to "mess up" just because I blew it on any given day. I have looked back at the situation carefully and I can ee exactly where I made my mistakes. I knew I was doing it - when I was doing it - But I still did it anyway ! ! (not the first time and probably won't be the last) ha ha.

I think that looking at this situation in this manner is major progress for me. Not so long ago I would have gotten really mad, given up and continued to overeat. But not today. I feel too good about myself. I feel better and healthier than I have in my whole life. I am beginning to like the new me and I want to keep her around for the rest of my life. Thanks to all of you who have shared with me and motivated me. And thanks for the Spark Pages. Looking at the progress that others have made always helps me! It makes me think - Yes! I can do it too! Hope everyone has a great Friday and an even greater weekend.

Another 5K under my belt. (June 6, 2009)

Here is my friend Linda

Here is me.

I finished my 5K this morning. My time was better than my first one - 41.58. My last one that I ran was 44. I am really thrilled. That means I am making progress. But I also want to point out that I was wearing my SPARK T-SHIRT! YEAH!!

Linda made really good time considering that this was her first race and she has only been running for three weeks. My husband decided at the last minute to do the walk. I am proud of him! Me and Linda went back to the last walker and walked in with her. We wanted to encourage her as we could tell she was struggling. That felt better than finishing the race! It was really cool.

During this race my left brain tried to get the best of me (those familiar with Jeff Galloway will know what I am talking about). My thoughts were - "I must be crazy." "There is no way I can do a half marathon!" and my mind wanted to quit entirely but I would not do that. I did a 2/2 run/walk segment and I kept telling myself that I only had 2 minutes to go (for my run/walk segment) and I could do anything for 2 minutes. I was really going out to fast and decided to slow down. I could not keep up with Linda so she ran on ahead. All in all it was a good experience. I won a beautiful back pack during the drawing for door prizes. When I walked back with it, the lady behind me looked at her daughter and said, "aw, that was the one you wanted." So I turned around and gave it to the little girl. I knew I didn't really need it. She was really happy. Her mother seemed somewhat shocked that I would do that. (there are still some nice people in this world)

All in all it was a very good experience. And....Linda says she is hooked now! She has the running fever! Awesome experience! Can't wait for the next one. But I'm still not too sure about the half marathon. But I have 26 weeks to train for it so I am sure I will be ready by then. Never in a million years would I ever have dreamed I would be doing this. Just last December I was a couch potato and slowing gaining back the weight I had lost. Thank you God for my health. Thank you for the ability to do this. Thank you for not giving up on me when I gave up on myself. And......THANK YOU SPARK PEOPLE for the encouragement.! You rock - all of you!

God bless daughters and a big THANK YOU to SparkPeople! (May 08, 2009)

Friday, May 08, 2009 This is mother's day weekend and my daughter is taking me and my mom to Natchez for the weekend. How sweet! Since I lost 3 pounds this week I want to be careful and not gain it back this weekend. The good thing is that my daughter is eating healthy and has lost weight herself so I should not be too tempted this weekend. She is going to make us a healthy dinner tonight and then we leave for Natchez in the morning. Trips have always been a struggle for me because I don't travel a lot and when I do, it is like I am on vacation and we know what happens some times when we are on vacation......all discretion goes out the window and I tend to eat anything and everything! But I am slowing learning that losing and gaining back and forth is not getting me anywhere. I am so happy to be in ONEderland! Go me! And I plan on staying there this time. I would like to thank everyone that writes a blog, asks questions, answers questions, shares your experience and all the other things that we do on Spark People. Without you this would not be possible. So a big tHANK YOU to all of you out there who read this. You are my encouragement and my accountability. Keep up the good work! And have a grand weekend! I know I am.